Facebook Mistake

So, looking around on Facebook today.  Found someone from high school looking on someone's friends...that lead to looking at more friends they had and people from High School.  NEVER should have done that! Nothing like seeing all these people with fancy jobs....owner, Dr at Holy Cross, CFO, Accountant, Stay at home Mom, blah blah blah  all their fancy houses that they are sitting in, and their skinny bodies. 
Because they don't have to work or have a job with flexible hours...

AND their trips they post about, and their children that are able to go skiing.  I Sooo wanted to be able to ski and do fun things with my children.  There isn't much better in life than a great day skiing in the mountains.  It is awfully expensive.  Really.  I thought for sure marrying who I did that he would be a good provider.  He was ALL talk.  ALL talk.  Bull S#@$@ talk.  It has been nothing but bills and dishonesty which has lead to criminal behavior...  (this post wasn't suppose to be about that)  I wanted so much to take the day off and take my children to Alta or Snow Basin or Snowbird.  I LOVE looking at the coats and clothing at sporting good stores.  Wish I was buying skis for Christmas or goggles or helmets or cool coats.  Instead of things like clothes and shoes and practical things...

I have to realize that they are all super fabulous children.  Really.  I only have to fight one of them to go to church and he has come around for the most part.  Jack is the first one to leave Sacrament meeting to get to class.  Which is such a switch from about 3 months ago when he refused to go at all!  They can all read and get good grades. They have lots of friends and are very nice to people.  Andrew walks down to my parents house after school on Wednesdays and takes their garbage out.  He also mows their lawn and we all shovel their snow.   Abi helps gma with her Kindle and computer.  Brooke is always willing to drive someone places when I can't quite figure out how to get everyone where they need to be...I hope they realize that I work soo hard to provide for them.  I have come up short soo many times.  Soo many more days in the month than I have money.  Our house has really never been adequate for our needs.  Too small.  And now we are in an area where we just don't fit in.  Its affordable to live here, but our ward is way too young and transient.  Oprah Winfrey said that no one on their death bed said that they wished they had a bigger house or nicer car.  I think I would because it has been such a struggle for me to provide what little we have.  I do wish I have been a better provider.