Our Family from the Outside

So I have been thinking lately, mostly on Sundays, what our family looks like from the outside to people.  What we appear to be to others.  We are always at church and on time.  There are usually a few of us sitting there, and then Nick and Andrew join us after the Sacrament.  Then I go to Primary to teach the 5 year olds.  If you surveyed most people at Church would they think we are just one nice happy family.  Most of them probably would say that they don't even know who we are.  But the people who don't know us, probably would think we have it all together.  They have absolutely no idea about our struggles or our past.  (which is neither good or bad, just the way it is)  Even the Bishop had no idea some of the details of our past....which got me started thinking about this....

Well, interestingly enough, that isn't the case we don't have it all together.  I should be homeless and hateful.  I am neither one.  I am full of regret for how things should have been, choices I made that should have been different ...(even though I am grateful for how they are too if that makes sense) I have done my best to keep my family functioning and doing all those things that normal families do.

I have learned one thing, that like us, we appear to be together (for the most part).  However, one never knows what anyone is going through or the extent of their troubles.  We bring our best public self to church and work (usually) and school, and compare others public selves to our private selves.  And that, my friend, is hard.

We have quite a bit of baggage as a family.  We really shouldn't be functioning as well as we do.  I keep it together as best as I can.  They are worth it.